Christmas in Soul Society SPECIAL
by Neko-sempai
Summary: Find out what's the pitch here in SS on Christmas Eve.


**Christmas in Soul Society Special**

On Christmas Eve, Aizen-sama asked me what present I wished for Christmas. You wanna know what that was?

"OWWHH PLEASEEE DOG-SAMA LET ME LET ME LET ME IN SOUL SOCIETY!!"

Of course he would obey my cravings for Soul Society and let me go. And then PUF, I was the next day in Soul Society. Actually while I write to you, I'm in Byakuya's office, using his favorite pen. You know how he gets when someone else is using his favorite pen?

No, You don't want to know.

So moving on, today is Christmas in Soul Society. Even Ichigo, Chado, Orihime and Ishida are here.

"Ah Lavi-san, isn't that Byakuya's precious ballpoint pen?"

Oh, even Urahara-san is here.

So let me tell you what happened a while ago...

I sneaked into the 10th division's barracks and into Hitsugaya's office.

"Can I steal Rangiku for a moment?" me grins.

"Please don't get drunk on Christmas."

My my.. this little one can be such a hardass sometimes. Brrr! I felt for a moment a dust of winter wind around here. But anyway, moving on. Me stole Rangiku and we went off buying presents for everyone in Seireitei. OH MY, IT WAS HELL OF A FUN DAY!

But Rangiku insisted on going to have some sake first. I remembered Hitsugaya's words and the chilly wind. No, the little one would definitely punish us for drinking while we buy presents for Christmas.

DAMN again that really chilly wind. Do I have flu or something?

But anyway, Rangiku here, said that sake would warm us up in these winter conditions. SO I AGREED! Oh by the way, Rangiku is here next to me and we both are accomplices in using Byakuya's precious one. She says "Yo dogs!" to everyone. She's a rapper now because everyone is complaining about her too feminine attitude.

*stares at her breats*

...YeahSO moving on. We went a little over board, but just A LITTLE YA KNOW!

AND BOUGHT PRESENTS KYAAH!

This Christmas I made some sexy-no-jutsu and pursued Yamamoto grandpa to let us hold the Christmas party in that weird hall where all captains meet. YOU KNOW! It's weird that's why we want it. And guess WHAT. He immediately accepted. Ps-Yamamoto is gay but please keep it a secret?

Danke schon.

And moving on. Two hours before the GREAT FIESTA (Aizen-sama is going to be proud of me for saying fiesta GAAH!), we sneaked into the hall and _left a message_ . Meanwhile we went to Soukyoku Hill and left there _some other things_ too.

HURRAY! HURRAY! This Christmas will be one hell of a Christmas!

So after two hours. We waited...

**And we waited... **

**And we waited... **

AND WE WAITED!! ...

AND WE DAMN WAITED!

You KNOW that WE waited so whatever, I'm not going to type anymore. Bleh, screw you.

So anyway, after we **SO** waited, guess who went into the hall. We installed a camera by the way in there, so we could... errm. Check on things ya know! *shows peace sign*

And Byakuya came first. OW LOOK HE HAS A SANTA HAT!

Awwww... that's so cute. He reached for the piece of paper when...

THE REST OF THE CAPTAINS AND LIEUTENANTS CRUSH HIM TO PIECES, REACHING FOR THE PAPER!

Awwww... poor Byakushi.

_"If you want to receive your presents, come to Soukyoku Hill or Hanatarou will die. D&G NOH JOKING IT'S B&L!! Bwuahahah pwned." _

So they came.

And each of them narrowed upon their presents.

For Yamamoto, we bought a "Papa to Kiss in The Dark" DVD, to get him a bit teary, remembering the YOUTHFULL past.

For his Lieutenant, a piece of paper saying _"Nothing for this Christmas because we don't know you."_ He cried.

For Soifon, we took A SUPER DUPER ULTRA SECRET photo of Yoruichi showering. You wouldn't want to know how she reacted.

"Hey boy, please clean the whole Ketchup around here. Thanks"

For Kira, we bought some box gloves but I'm afraid we spent the money for nothing. But oh well, being **considerate** ...

For Captain Unohana I PERSONALLY bought some band-aids 'cause my dog bit her. IT'S NOT AIZEN-SAMA, it's... another dog.

For Hinamori we bought a cute little apron saying **"I WILL LOVE AIZEN-SAMA UNTIL DEATH"** . I think she might like it.

For Byakushi we bought a new ballpoint pen and a card saying _"That's in case we will break yours."_

For Renji we bought SOME PLASTICINE. I don't know why really... Rangiku insisted on buying it.

For Komamura we bought a cool hair product for dogs. OH MY... HIS FUR ... HAIR WILL NOW BE ENVIED!

For Kyoraku, Rangiku said she had an old wine home, so she gave it to him as a present. And as for his lieutenant, we both bought a card saying _"Are you feeling rat or mouse?"_ because you know... we really can't stand her 'cause she's such a nerd...

For Hisagi Shuuhei, we bought some... kama.. sutra...

For Hitsugaya we bought a POKEMON PLUSHIE HURRAY!! You press the foot and it goes **"WOOOH YOU'RE A WINNER TODAY BUDDY!"** it's really that awesome.

Rangiku said she'd make herself a secret present so I let it go...

For Ken-chan, we bought Anew Clinical Lift and Touch. Ahem, no comment over.Hope we'll survive. Hope he likes it.

For Yachiru, we BOUGHT AGAIN THE POKEMON PLUSHIE because they were both on sale plus a cherry candy.

For Ikkaku-san here, we bought ProActive, for the pimples on his baldness. *wink wink*

For Yumichika, I went back in time to Snow White and stole TEH Mirror who says **"You're the most beautiful princess in the world"** or something like that, I don't quite remember. It was a long time ago... And yes, I did that 'cause Yumichika's hot. And so it his seyiuu. JUUUN YOU SMEXY PIECE!! **3**

So ahem, moving on? For Mayuri grandpa, Rangiku stole that thing with water and soap and you blow in it and it makes bubbles-thing from this child who wasn't paying attention so it was a cheap one in here.

As for his lieutenant, who's PROBABLY his daughter too--?

"INCESTUOUS!!"

Yeah, Rangiku's right. Incestuous. So for Nemu, we bought... what did we bought Rangiku?

"Ermm... socks..."

Yeap socks. They're green. Grrr, my favorite color.

So for Ukitake-taicho, we bought this pink dye, we wanted to try a little experiment at night? Ahehehe...

And as for Rukia, we went in Karakura and stole Ichigo's underwear. Rangiku here thinks it's the most suited present out of all.

Oh, remind me to buy a lwittle present to Ichimaru and Dog-sama too. Forget Kananme please, he's so annoying and blind.

"He's too blind!!"

Yeah, too blind!

So I hope everyone enjoys their presents. MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

Oh oh! We almost forgot. "How much money did we spent Rangiku?"

"Let me check Byakushi's wallet. Um... about half of his money... ermm, that makes... 10 thousand."

Yeap, that's ten thousand folks.

"Hey, I thought it cost a few hundred dollars... "

"Sweetie, I need to buy my own present okay?"

**"OOOOOH--OH NOES. THAT'S BYAKUSHI STANDING IN TEH DOOR FRAME!!!????" **

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**kldhshfw**

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Hello once again. I'm continuing this letter from Las Noches's hospital. I never got to buy any presents for dog-sama and Ichimaru because _a little something_ ... came up.

I'm gonna end this now so **HAPPY MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL YAH and Hippie Holidays!!**

* * *

**Hope you guys have great holidays. Prepare to "step in" the next year talented, beautiful, smart, peaceful and kind. Work for that everyone! ^__~**


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